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Joke of the Day

"I'll take two glasses of lemonade please... ...said the man. But hold the ""ades"". Waitress: So you just want two lemons? Man: No, I just don't want AIDS."

"Which US state is friendliest toward the Japanese? Ohio"

"My girlfriend is a porn star.. she is going to be *so* pissed when she finds out."

"Loving someone who doesn't love you back is like hugging a cactus. The tighter you hold on. The more it hurts."

"What did the tooth say to the departing dentist?...Fill me in when you get back"

"People who like trance music are very persistent. They don't techno for an answer"

"Read in Richard Pryors voice... The other day I had to take a shit so bad... The shit came out and said DAMMMMMNNN I gotta take a shit!"

"You hear about the new cemetery? People are dying to get in there..."

"What's black and always in the back of a police car? The seat."

"Why do bachelors like smart women? Because they're so rare."