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Joke of the Day

"Oscar Pistorius says he won't be entering other races until the trial is over. I think in prison he'll have to worry more about other races entering him."

"You know what my grandpa said to me right before he kicked the bucket? Hey Billy how far do you think I can kick this bucket"

"I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction."

"Prostitution problems are had in Canada because... We use $1 and $2 coins. You can't throw those at strippers. Some of us ignore this problem and use Canadian Tire money."

"[opens lunchbox] YOGURT?!? o no... that means... [my dad is at the office surounded by men and women in suits asking if they can hav a dunkaroo]"

"I like my coffee like I make my women. Hot, and bitter."

"If Batman doesn't wear underwear with my picture all over them, then this relationship is as one-sided as I feared."

"Why did Walter White not pay for his pizza? Because it was on the house."

"I believe what politicians say about as much as I believe the person who says, ""I never got that text."""

"I just responded to a text message with: I can't hear you, you're breaking up"