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Joke of the Day

"how to you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? you wave at her."

"What did the camel toe say to the moose nuckle on New Years eve? Let's get toe up!"

"Parents yelling ""I'm not going to ask you again"" at their kids, will definitely be asking them again"

"What is the difference between the avian flu and the swine flu? One requires a tweetment and the other need an oinkment."

"i wonder how many time-travelers accidemtaly went back in time instead of forward but then saw a knight & thought ""wow look at this robot!!"""

"Most people cry while chopping an onion... The secret is to not form an emotional bond."

"I tried gay phone sex last night, but I'm not sure I'm doing it right. I was the giver and it was the receiver."

"Don't you hate it when people ask for upvotes? Upvote if you agree."

"I don't always think I'm right....but whenever I think I'm wrong I tend to be mistaken."

"Did you hear about the lawyer with a fetish for loopholes? He got off on a technicality."