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Joke of the Day
"My last girlfriend was a promiscuous impressionist. She did everybody."
Next Joke
"*goes down on one knee* One Knee: I have a girlfriend"
"To understand the difference between Italians and Canadians all you need to know is two things. Italian sausage and Canadian bacon..."
"My grandpa was 1/5th of the way through his 58th mathematics degree when he died... He was pretty rad."
"""I didn't go to grad school to assemble agenda folios for the quarterly board meeting"" I think as I drizzle Dawn into the CEO's coffee pot."
"A bag of flour is bragging to his friend about his new girlfriend ...His friend asks ""Does she have a sifter?"""
"My girlfriend says I'm hopeless at fixing appliances. Well she's in for a shock."
"I need an aggressive dog-barking sound on my phone, for whenever anyone knocks on the bathroom door when I'm in there"
"ISIS new way of recruitment ISIS leader posted a job offer for new workers : "" Need somebody with a head on his shoulders """
"what's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Well I can't peanut butter my dick up ur ass."