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Joke of the Day

"Lucy fell in front of the train she screamed out for help ""HELP ME! I DONT WANT TO DIE THIS WAY!!"", so Luke came running over and cut her throat instead. Nice work Luke. You should be more like Luke."

Next Joke
 
"Just saw a commercial for ""affordable napkins"" and now I feel stupid for buying all these diamond-encrusted ones."
"A farmer has 96 cows. When he rounds them up, he has 100. Title"
"No matter how loud she screams, DO NOT take IT out. protect your credit card guys :)"
"You know why I drink apple juice? Because OJ will kill you"
"Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo drizzle"
"Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 killed the headphone jack with lightning"
"""Why Isn't The Media Covering This?"" the media asks other media, peering into its media mirror, media-ing before a day of media in media."
"Accidentally swallowed some food coloring. I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside"
"My team got silver medal in the sex Olympics. We would have got gold but I came first in the orgy."