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Joke of the Day
"Apparently being poor is genetic, my son loves bologna and thinks pants are optional."
Next Joke
"My wife freaks out if any of my sperm gets on her face or hair or sister."
"I swallowed two strings by accident, and when I finally passed them they were miraculously tied together I shit you knot"
"Have you ever been hit repeatedly by a wave? It hertz a lot"
"Maybe if women would quit playing games they'd worry less about competition"
"The roads must have been full of Communists... I kept hitting reds on the way home."
"LPT: Never buy anything made of velcro... It's a total rip-off."
"Coworker: ""How was your weekend?"" Me: ""You know, they killed Socrates because he asked too many questions."""
"It's called PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken."
"How to kill time. Hold your right ear with your lett hand and your nose with your right hand, then hold your left ear with your right hand and your nose with your left hand, and repeat and repeat."