37297

Joke of the Day

"Flies only live for 24 hours.. Except for the ones that get in your room. Those fuckers live forever."

"An Irish man walks out of a bar...."

"What do you call a nursing home with a buffet? A Golden Corral."

"What happens when you give a politician viagra? He gets taller"

"A guy told me he didn't have a penis I doubt he gets cocky often."

"I think all crime scenes should be photographed on Instagram."

"My friend just said this: Never be a half assed dog owner... It'll bite you in the ass every time"

"My girlfriend asked me if I wanted to reheat the leftover turkey from last night's NYE dinner. I told her I quit hot food, cold turkey"

"I used to be a rubbish collector. Now I'm pretty good."

"What do you call a Belgian with a cold? Phlegmish"