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Joke of the Day

"Christmas always sucked when I was a kid... I believed in Santa Claus, and unfortunately, so did my parents."

"What do you call a nun on a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile &nbsp; ^^^^^^^^^^^[inb4^^repost](https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/search?q=nun+on+a+wheelchair&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all)"

"You're like that person playing Pictionary who draws something terribly and just keeps circling it."

"I am quite old, so I wasn't shocked today during a thorough inspection to find that I had a gray pubic hair. The other people on the elevator seemed pretty surprised, though."

"Do you know why lions eat raw meat? Because lions don't know how to cook."

"Have you heard about the guy who reanimated the dead? He made Mary Shelly roll over in her grave."

"What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jewish person? The Boy Scout comes home from camp. ^First ^time ^posting ^on ^this ^sub ^don't ^know ^what's ^too ^offensive ^and ^what's ^not ^sorry."

"A rope walks into a bar And sees someone sitting at the bar reposting this joke. The rope hangs the reposter."

"My wife yelled, ""This is the LAST TIME I'm going to tell you to take out the trash"", and I thought, thank goodness THAT is finally over."

"Why are orphans terrible baseball players? They don't know where home is."