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Joke of the Day
"A priest, a rapist and a pedophile walks into a bar... He orders a drink"
Next Joke
"C'mon phone, let's go to bed."
"I just deleted the same tweet twice for two different typos and now I can't tweet it again because it's already been stolen"
"Rejected Disney Movie Titles: 1) Find My Fish Son 2) A Shit Ton Of Spotted Dogs 3) Peter Pot 4) Pretty Lady & Big Foot Face 5) It's Cold"
"Who was the best prostitute in history? Ms.Packman, for 25 cents she'd swallow balls til she died."
"How come people who think they know everything never seem to know when to shut up?"
"My wife is gorgeous, selfless, amazing, highly intelligent and looking over my shoulder as I type."
"I'm not lazy... I'm just on my energy saving mode."
"Why should you never get into an argument with a dictionary? Because they'll always have the last word."
"A photon walks through a bar"