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Joke of the Day

"Somebody accused me of being condescending today... ...by the way, condescending is shown or characterized by a patronizing or superior attitude toward others."

"A world without women would be a pain in the ass."

"One of my nipples is a different color from the other two. Is this normal?"

"How do we know that Dumbledore was a horcrux? Because killing him after the second film wasn't good enough."

"-Can you describe the jellyfish that stung you? -Yes, it looked like a lazy toddler tried to draw an octopus."

"Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range."

"There sure are alot of the_Donald posts on the front page It sure makes me glad that 14 year olds can't vote."

"What's the difference between Mexicans and Jesus? Jesus doesn't have tattoos of Mexicans all over *his* body."

"What do you call a black guy who reneges on a promise? Unreliable, you racist prick."

"what do you get when you cross copper and zinc? brass."