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Joke of the Day

"HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR, It's the year of the snake !!! I'm still keep accidentally writing Dragon on all my checks."

"Sometimes I just sit and run my fingers through my lovers hair. It's a nice way to let them know my love and also that we're out of napkins."

"The cool thing about robbing a library is that you have two weeks before they notice."

"Why did the.. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side"

"How can you tell when it's time to go to bed at Michael Jacksons house? When the big hand touches the little hand"

"I'm testing my theory that I can get away with putting a 0 or N/A in a work report that requires answers when I don't know the answers."

"I got a job digging graves, I don't know how, I just fell into it."

"Will reddit let me get by with this one? What do the WWE and CNN have in common? They're both fake, but sometimes people still get hurt."

"What's the difference between Bernie Sanders and a free lunch? Bernie Sanders exists."

"In Heaven Me: I can't believe how much stuff the Bible got wrong Gid: You idiots couldn't even get my Giddamn name right"