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Joke of the Day

"Two of my Redditor buddies just ""came out"" to me. They told me they are OP's"

"Is it me or.. Is it me or does this place smell like up dog? ""What's up dog?"" Oh nothing much what's up with you?"

"What do you call a group of Pigeons and Chickens? A Coo Clucks Clan"

"What is Santa's motto? Wrap your package before you shove it down the chimney."

"I drink Mountain Dew for the protective coating it leaves on my teeth. The kidney stones are a close second."

"me: they're having a special, buy 3 dvds get 1 free wife: so why do you have 4 space jam's? me: ...because it's buy 3 get 1 free"

"Rey should really make herself a new lightsaber. The one she has now has 100% hand loss rate. \\\_()_/ "

"I ate so much at Thanksgiving, I had to loosen my Fitbit. (Credit to my future mother-in-law for this suprise zinger)"

"11: Dad, what's your spirit animal? Mine's a tiger. Me: Remember that chubby mouse named Gus in the baby-tee from Cinderella? 11: ..."

"Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by up to 90%. - It's called wedding cake."