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Joke of the Day

"January 29, 1802, 2 AM: I hope this letter finds you well. Are you up? March 2: I am, good sir April 6: Would you kindly come over? May 9: K"

"Why do owners of muffler shops sleep so good at night? They're exhausted."

"Why is a baby like an diamond? Because it's a dear little thing."

"What's the name of the Iraqi basketball team? Alley-oop Akbar"

"At school, I saw my principal walking around in a daze. I asked him what happened, and he just looked at me and said, ""I've lost my faculties!"""

"What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken!"

"deleted scenes are rarely worth the time but on Honey I Shrunk the Kids check out one where the dad thinks he's alone and starts jerking it"

"Internet Explorer is so slow If this video takes any longer, the girl in it will be a legal age"

"How many chores can horny maids do? 70. Cooking and 69."

"What did the audio visual cable say when it got 80% on its final? HDMI"