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Joke of the Day

"The human brain is an amazing organ. It keeps working 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and 52 weeks a year, from before you leave the womb, right up until you find religion."

Next Joke
 
"Did you know Stalin got hit in the groin with a potato when he was young? That's how he became a dictator."
"Why couldn't Sally use the swings? She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. What did Sally get for her Birthday? We don't know, she didn't open it yet."
"I have a friend named miles But he moved to Europe so now he goes by Kilometers."
"[Spelling bee, to clench victory] ""O,P... (hesitates) A,W,E,S,O,M,E."" Judges? (Opossum judges whispering for a bit) Correct."
"Some of the weirdest looking Jehovah's Witnesses kept knocking on my door last night."
"How did Jared lose 150lbs? He kicked two 7-year-olds out of his bed."
"What is the scientific measurement for moistness? Digits..."
"What's the difference between a pianist and a penis? One tickles the ivories and one tickles the ovaries."
"What winks and fucks like a tiger? *winks*"