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Joke of the Day
"How do you now when somebody is retarded on Facebook? Well, its complicated."
Next Joke
"I'm friends with 25 letters of the alphabet... ...I don't know y"
"*stands in front yard, hands on hips, giving each autumn leaf that falls on my lawn a stern, disapproving look*"
"Why can't you hear it when a pteranodon goes to the bathroom? Because they're all dead."
"I just purchased duct tape at the Dollar Store to fix all of the other shit I bought at the Dollar Store. Life is going exactly as planned."
"What kind of shoes does a thief wear? Sneakers."
"Eating too much cake is the deadly sin of gluttony But not eating too much pie, because the sin of pi is always zero."
"Why did the bigamist cross the road? To get to the other bride."
"A sandwich walks into a bar The bartender stares at it blankly and says, ""I'm sorry, we don't serve food."""
"A pirate walks into a bar with his ship's steering wheel shoved down his pants. The bartender says, ""hey pirate that's got to be hard to walk with."" Pirate says, ""aye, it be driving me nuts."""