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Joke of the Day

"My car horn hasn't worked for a long time. Today, a Boy Scout fixed it and all he said was, ""Beep repaired!"""

Next Joke
 
"Thanks to the internet I know the actual medical terms for all the ailments that I'm positive I'm dying from."
"A Jew and an American are sitting on a bus... The Holocaust denier farts. The Jew says, ""That's gross!"" The Holocaust denier says, ""What, a little gas never killed anyone."""
"What did the Jewish lesbian say to her girlfriend before taking her virginity? L'hymen"
"Pretty cool how you can turn cotton into delicious candy or a totally comfortable shirt to wear."
"If King Kong went to Hong Kong to play ping-gong and died what would they put on his coffin? A lid."
"I love cooking with wine Sometimes I even put it in the food."
"I just fucked up instant oatmeal like some kind of husband in a commercial."
"Um how poor are you to sell your own yard? For real. And like, nobody's going to buy it with tables full of junk all over it. Geez. Idiots."
"It sucks that bowtie pasta is the only edible formal wear my grocery store carries."
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