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Joke of the Day

"HILLARY CLINTON: Putin wants a puppet as the US president KERMIT THE FROG: YAAAYYYYYYYYY!!!"

"Also, kids? Don't DM us pretending you are some school official cancelling school. Closings don't work like that. & we're not that dumb."

"There are only 10 bad people in the world.. And i get Christmas cards from 9 of them."

"What do post-impressionist painters sing when painting a Frozen landscape? Let it Gogh!"

"Never treat someone like Coca-Cola when they treat you like Pepsi."

"Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make Then they call me ugly and poor"

"Did you know that Davy Crockett had three ears? His left ear, his right ear, and his wild frontier."

"How many redditors does it take to get a joke? Three. One to get the punchline, and one to point out the math is wrong."

"What did the Korean girl say about anal? Don't go in my thongoh"

"Honey, give me the baby. -Wait until he cries -Until he cries..? Why..? -Because I can't find him..."