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Joke of the Day

"I have no problems with buying tampons... I am a fairly modern man. But apparently they're not a ""proper"" present. (Jimmy Carr)"

"Don't make a scientist mad. They will research you."

"How much crack did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men"

"Roses are red Violets are Glorious Don't play hide and go seek with Oscar Pistorius."

"I met up with two friends of mine. One of them asked me what did I do yesterday, and I said I watched Rashomon. But the second friend had a different story."

"In park people come across man playing chess with dog They are of surprise and say ""What clever dog!"" But man say: ""No, no, he isn't so clever. I am lead by three game to one!"""

"Which operetta make the Gorilla crack up? Nutty Marietta!"

"Young man cashier: Ma'am, if you don't mind me saying, you have really beautiful eyes. What I heard: Ma'am"

"Whenever I meet a new baby, I stand still and let it come up to me and smell my hand first before I try to pet it"

"I was in that kosher supermarket earlier. I knew something was wrong when an automated voice said, ""unexpected gunman in the bagging area""."