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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a cow with no legs? A cow with no legs of course. HA got heeem."

"Those of you wondering what its like to be married: Just found out this morning I'm on day 3 of an argument I didn't know I was having..."

"mob boss: stick his body in the compost pile me: wha mob boss (grabbing my collar intently): we might be killers, but u only got one earth"

"The NSA wants Edward Snowden to leave Russia. NSA: Hey Edward, you should really come back to America so we can talk. Edward: I can't. I'm Snowden."

"I'm not saying I'm smarter than Steve Jobs or anything but I would have made the iPhone charger about 5 feet longer..."

"My Dr. wrote me a prescription My Dr. Wrote me a prescription for daily sex, but my girlfriend insists it says dyslexia."

"It's OK people with a poor grasp of the English language, I'm a sex attic too."

"Did you hear about the movie,""Constipation""? ...it never came out."

"Why are criminals so good at basketball? They shoot first and ask questions later."

"Want to hear a good comeback story? Brokeback Mountain."