31984
Joke of the Day
"What's the most assigned elementary school essay in Chicago? ""What I want to be *IF* I grow up"""
Next Joke
"Dolce and Gabbana are to be jailed for tax evasion. Looks like someone finally called the fashion police."
"That annoying moment when you're waiting for a text & you get one but it's from the wrong person."
"What branch of the military did the hipster join? The Salvation Army."
"I like to point at pregnant women's bellies and ask ""makin a baby, huh?"". Then point to mine and say ""got some poop brewin over here""."
"My pet butterfly got a tattoo of my lower back"
"Why is a toothless dog like a tree? It has more bark than bite."
"What do you call it when you get a blowjob from a woman with Zika? A little head"
"Stranger:""Your tag is sticking out"" Me:""Does it say size 4?"" Stranger:""Yes it does"" Then don't touch it bitch,it's supposed to stick out"
"[A Dad about to give the birds & the bees talk] ""Son, when-"" *Watches son try to poke a Capri Sun for 35 minutes* ""Know what, we're good"""