31905

Joke of the Day

"What does a girl who loves giving head eat for breakfast? scrotemeal"

"Being married is like peeing in your pants... At first it's nice and hot, but then it just gets sloppy and uncomfortable."

"Bad porn is like bad spaghetti It's overdone, the noodles are soft, and it's *waaaaaaay* to saucy for my tastes."

"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is heavy, and one is a little lighter."

"How does a Jew make tea? Hebrews it. -- How does a Jew make beer? --Hebrews Hops"

"It's weird for Me not having a Pope. I feel like Burns without Smithers."

"We use a very accurate term to describe our government. Politics, poly meaning many, and ticks meaning bloodsucking creatures."

"Him: Mm girl, back that ass up. Me: Like on iCloud or something?"

"How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? One. We are efficient and dont have humour. Edit: Wow this blew up. As a German, I didnt expect this."

"You should never yell ""Fire!"" in a crowded theater The gunman will shoot when he's ready, it isn't polite to rush him"