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Joke of the Day
"Horrifically awaiting the day all the shampoo bottles in my shower decide to squeeze me back."
Next Joke
"A family walks into a Hotel... The Dad walks up to the desk and says ""I hope the porn is disabled."" The receptionist says ""It's regular porn you sick fuck."""
"I killed a man once... ..for $30. Sucked him off for another 10... Never did see that $10"
"Hey baby, what's your resonance frequency?"
"A priest, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a bar. He orders a drink..."
"What's Isis' favorite race? The 100-meter daesh. Q: What's Isis' favorite punctuation mark? A: The em-daesh. Q: How much cinnamon does the Isis recipe for gingersnaps call for? A: Just a daesh."
"What do you do if you come across a lion in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologise."
"What do you call a French guy wearing sandals? Felipe Flop!"
"Our laundry room flooded because an apple chunk clogged the washer hose. Go ahead, have kids. They have pocket apples."
"I don't think Donald Trump realizes how strong and unified Latinos are... Every Latino is like a brick. When they come together they form a wall."