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Joke of the Day
"what type of dog do you see at the zoo? a shitzu"
Next Joke
"How come Justin Bieber doesn't like to shop at Sports Authority? Because he likes Dick's."
"I knew I could convince my wife to get an Abortion... All she needed was a shove in the right direction... and a set of stairs."
"When I heard that Dr. Heimlich died at age 96... I got all choked up."
"I got fired on my first day as a paramedic for trying to revive everyone with true love's first kiss."
"4-yr-old son gave smartest answer ever to ""How do you know if something is art?"" ""People tell you."""
"*still doesn't understand when or why asterisks started indicating action*"
"what's the worst part about being a pedophile? trying to fit in."
"My girlfriend is quite pessimistic about our sex life, but I'm a vagina half full kind of guy."
"ARMY WIVES SUNDAYS AT 11 ON LIFETIME. IT'S NOT TV. IT'S NOT HBO. IT'S NOT FX. IT'S NOT EVEN WE. IT'S LIFETIME. WHAT, LIKE YOU'RE SO GREAT?"