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Joke of the Day

"Professor: Heavens! Someone stole my wallet! Wife: Didn't you feel a hand in your pocket? Professor Yes but I thought it was mine!"

"Advent calendars Their days are numbered."

"The spanish word of the day is ""Juicy"" ""TELL ME IF *JUICY* THE COPS!"""

"Why didn't Sean Connery get his roof fixed? He said he ""couldn't find a shingle person to do it."""

"Finally successful enough to have ""haters"", still not successful enough to be successful"

"What's the difference between a good joke and a woman? The good joke doesn't get a black eye when you tell it a second time."

"If you've never gotten out of the shower and dried off with paper towels, you probably do your laundry more often than I do."

"Walked in on the big pillow in bed with my favorite blanket. Feel so betrayed."

"What did Adam say to Eve on the day before Christmas? ""It's Christmas, Eve."""

"Why did the baseball player fail at the math test? He used base 3."