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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a good joke and a woman? The good joke doesn't get a black eye when you tell it a second time."

"This tweet is made from 100% recycled characters."

"When someone tries to argue with me I'm like ""hey pal let me stop you right there"" and then physically turn them around to face someone else"

"When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring... When she was in a good mood, it turned blue. When she was in a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead..."

"A young couple are in the middle of an argument... Man: ""Yeah well, your hemorrhoids are disgusting!"" Woman: ""At least they stay out of my asshole!"""

"90% of owning a dog is telling it to stop barking."

"Two men walk into a bar... One of them gets a concussion and the other gets a bruise on his forehead."

"Anyone who thinks that women can't be funny has obviously never watched one try to parallel park."

"Trump is in good company, coining words just like Shakespeare. The two even share their feelings about foreigners. I mean Shakespeare *coined* the word chink."

"Person: I like your name. Me: thanks, I got it for my birthday"