30171

Joke of the Day

"I'm at the bar & I'm trying to convince this girl with a leopard print shirt to go & bite this girl with a zebra print shirt."

"Why did Sally drop her ice-cream cone? She got hit by a bus."

"If asked 'Whats up?' respond 'An animated film about the journey of a boy & an old man' then wink & fly away carried by hundreds of balloons"

"RIP Boiling water You'll be mist."

"DID YOU KNOW? If you sleep on your side every night, your face eventually slides around your head like on a flounder."

"What did the buffalo call his gay kid? His BiSon."

"Why was the calf afraid? He was a cow-herd!"

"What do you get when you mix nosleep with eye bleech. sleep bleech"

"Two scientists walk into a bar... ...The first one says: ""I'll have some H2O"" The second one says: ""I'll have some water too"" The first scientist got angry because his assassination attempt failed."

"(nsfw) How do you know the female bartender is mad at you? There's a string in your bloody Mary"