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Joke of the Day

"I'm at the bar & I'm trying to convince this girl with a leopard print shirt to go & bite this girl with a zebra print shirt."

"What do you call a one-legged asian woman? Irene"

"What is the similarity between tight rope walking and an old lady giving you head? You don't want to look down."

"No one is more shocked that I brought my cat to a baseball game than my cat."

"You say pigs can't fly... but swine flu!"

"What do Albanian kids want to be when they grow up? Italian"

"What do Nazi pilots eat for breakfast? Luftwaffles"

"What's black hairy and writes under water? A ball-point gorilla!"

"I can't afford a police siren so I just taped a crying baby to the top of my car. It's working, people are moving out of my way."

"I witnessed an attempted murder earlier... Luckily only one crow showed up..."