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Joke of the Day
"Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig jumped into a giant pit of mud."
Next Joke
"I promise you that there are three types of people in this world. Those who keep their promises, and those who don't."
"What causes a pilot to cry after sex? ...the [mace](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mace_(spray)"
"Every so often my mother has a great idea, usually it involves leaving my house."
"The entire 15 years my wife and I have been married we only had one fight and it's still not over."
"""That kid..."" That kid is so nerdy, he's as classy as Frank Sinatra, haha... Wait..."
"I had a boyfriend once....right up until the moment my dad asked him ""so what do you do?"" and he replied your daughter. He's Dead."
"11/10 people don't understand statistics ."
"Jesus goes to a palm reader And she nailed it! Saw Gallagher last weekend and this had me in tears."
"1.25pm: Do you love me more than football? 4.25pm: Yes, of course."