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Joke of the Day
"If there's two things I've learned in life It's that I'm awful at counting."
Next Joke
"We don't have mistletoe at Christmas so we just kiss under the influence."
"Coldplay is like depression you can hear."
"So, I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend recently. I had to drop the bomb twice before she got the message."
"What do you do if you find a black mamba in your toilet? Wait until he's finished."
"I had sex with a Chinese girl. It was great... But I was horny again an hour later."
"(Translated from my mother tongue) What does a man do when he wants to end a marriage passively? He tries finding the expiration date on the marriage cirtifficate"
"Me (to a baby): Hush little baby don't say a word. Momma's gonna buy you a mocking bird Mom: like hell I'll buy that kid anything.."
"Falafel is a weird name cuz I actually falgreat every time I eat one"
"If our next President is Donald Trump.. He will put the P.O.S in P.O.T.U.S"