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Joke of the Day

"So, I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend recently. I had to drop the bomb twice before she got the message."

"Why was the Amish girl kicked out of her community? Too Mennonite"

"To a necrophiliac, what is the only thing better than a human-sized refrigerator? A human-sized microwave."

"Watch out for children on the road. They're terrible drivers."

"How many Steam employees does it take to change a light bulb? Honestly Im not sure, they havent got back to me yet. It's been 3 weeks."

"I went to the zoo the other day. It was empty, except for a single dog... It was a shih tzu :)"

"My wife told me to give her nine inches and make it hurt. So I fucked her twice, and hit her with a brick."

"What's the difference between JFK and Bill Clinton? One got his head blown off, the other was assassinated"

"Two Muffins are sitting in an oven One Muffin looks at the other and says: ""Boy, it sure is hot in here"" The other muffin turns and screams; ""Holy Crap! A talking Muffin!"""

"I am really good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know y. Credit: Chris Turner"