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Joke of the Day
"What happens when a rock gets high? He gets stoned.. Badum tsss"
Next Joke
"My gangster name would be The Street. If someone dared to oppose me I'd say ominous things like ""Look both ways before you cross The Street"""
"The filling in fortune cookies tastes like paper.."
"I wanted to rope down this mountain... but I found it quite rappelent."
"If I die in my sleep, my only request is that you fold me up in my futon and sell it on Craigslist"
"Today a preacher told me that Jesus died for me, it made feel feel horrible.... I didn't even know the poor guy was sick!"
"[first date] HER: Do you have any hobbies? ME: Yes! Wait, did you say ""hobbits""? HER: No, hobbies ME: Oh, then no"
"A woman walks into a bar. She asks the bartender for a double entendre, and the bartender gives it to her."
"Why do rednecks hate math? Integration."
"the poor people on welfare should not eat steak and sea food. they should be drinking raw sewage out of an old boot while thanking me"