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Joke of the Day

"Guinness book of world records I use to have my dick in the Guinness book of world records, but then the librarian told me I had to leave."

"I'm quite confident that the reason i'm single Is because i didn't forward that chain letter in 2008"

"I'm voting for Trump... I've never seen a president assassinated."

"Did you hear about the dentist who planted a garden?... A month later he was picking his teeth"

"What fruit do Romeo and Juliet eat? Cantelope"

"What has three feet but no legs? A yardstick."

"It was a rainy day, she had just left him and was walking back home... ""Nobody will find him there"" She thought as she walked."

"Which U.S Presidents are not buried inside the United States? Carter, the Bushes, Clinton, and Barry-O"

"""Hell, yes."" ...the devil answered the phone."

"My husband told me he'd like to be woken up by a blowjob... ...so I put my dick in his mouth to wake him up."