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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend attended a 3 day course on ""How Not to talk on the phone"" but missed the beginning. She mistook the course to be ""How to talk on the phone."""

"What is the difference between an art student and a dead baby? The dead baby can feed a family of four."

"What did the cow say to the paintbrush? Moo. As told by my kid this morning."

"If we become engaged will you give me a ring? Sure, what's your phone number?"

"I dont make typos. I make new words."

"How did the hipster burn his tongue? He ate pizza before it was cool."

"In honour of Agatha Christie, turn off all the lights and kill one of your work colleagues."

"COP: The killer wrote a message on the victim's mirror ME: You can't prove it was me COP: It was written in Dorito dust ME: I want a lawyer"

"What do you call a Norwegian prostitute? A fjord escort."

"Whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stpehen hawking after a house fire."