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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a prostitute in the bath tub and a nun? The nun has hope in her soul."

"Highways need 4 lanes per side. A racecar wannabe, a normal driver, an old people who drive 30 in a 70 and a where the hell am I lane."

"You know its Monday when your left eye wont open and your right eye is twitching."

"Me: I'm not saying I hate your voice, but when you start talking, I understand the way dogs feel about fireworks. *howls* Co-worker:"

"Have you heard about the new super-sensitive condoms? They hang around after the man leaves and talk to the woman."

"I hear Tarantino's next movie is about a Sichuan restaurant... It's called ""the heatful eat"""

"Those who dont discriminate sexually are called bisexuals"

"Why do crippled kids get picked on so much? Because they can't stand up for themselves."

"Did you hear about the kidnapping? he woke up"

"Whenever I go to Subway, when they ask if I would like my sandwich toasted, I say yes & then I raise my cup of Coke & say, ""To my sandwich!"""