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Joke of the Day

"What's worse than waking up after a party and finding a penis drawn on your face? Finding out it was traced"

"Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle? A: Shine a flashlight in their ear."

"Hey everyone look I'm really sorry because I know we JUST buried the casket but I'm 75% sure my wallet fell in there and I was wondering if"

"What's the difference between a bitch and a whore? A whore will sleep with anyone, a bitch will sleep with anyone but you."

"Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabets, your left foot, a theme song to a television show and the blood of your enemies"

"Food service workers should be completely hairless at all times."

"Did you hear about the antelope... Did you hear about the antelope that was trampled by a herd of elephants while getting dressed? He was a self dressed stamped antelope."

"Someone shit in your fridge? Well get a new family"

"I could never become a vetanarian. That job takes balls!"

"Where does a one legged waitress work at? IHOP"