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Joke of the Day

"Does syria have any walmarts? No, only targets."

"I looked up ""thesaurus"" in my thesaurus and it says ""Don't be a smart-ass""."

"If only Darwinian theory worked on request."

"If I had a dollar for every maths exam I failed I'd have about $6.50 right now"

"Bruce Willis is at the supermarket, standing by the cucumbers & laughing hysterically, pointing at them with tears streaming down his face"

"Its too expensive to put up Christmas lights these days. I'm just going to hire a bunch of Mexicans to sit on my roof with flashlights."

"If we truly become what we mock... ...I think I'm going to start mocking some smarter, more successful people, for a change."

"It's complicated having sex with hipsters. They don't like things that are ""in""."

"A terrorist attack has blown away 2 local houses one made of straw and the other made of wood. Police think that it's probably a lone wolf."

"What was the policeman's baby's first words ? Hallo Hallo Hallo !"