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Joke of the Day

"I smoked before going to the dentist & didn't know they would let me have laughing gas &watch Netflix Im cross faded af having the best time"

"Just thought of way to discourage teenage smoking. Instead of saying ""Cancer"" on boxes replace it with the word ""Acne""."

"I thought I'd repost an old joke... Oops wrong sub..."

"Your cell should have a 'drunk mode' like 'airplane mode' so that no text messages or tweets leave your phone but you can still call a taxi."

"Accidentally left my phone at home, now I know how Kevin McCallister's parents felt."

"Did you hear about the recently unemployed electrician? Apparently he's now ohm-less."

"I wonder if deaf schizophrenic people hear voices... I never asked them"

"I got arrested for shooting a black man I was charged for trying to impersonate a police officer"

"Knock Knock... Knock Knock Who's there? Tom Hulce. Tom Hulce who? That's Hollywood."

"Huge sale this weekend, we have too many mountain lions, please come buy a mountain lion, this was a horrible business plan, one guy got ate"