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Joke of the Day

"So I was feeling really depressed due to the attack in Paris... I phoned the Islamic Samaritans. When I said I was feeling suicidal they got all excited and asked if I knew how to fly a plane."

"Tried this new Playlist in the car, on the treadmill, at my desk, but it seems the best place for me to listen to old Greenday is 1992."

"I had an embarrassing sexual problem with my wife last week - I came too early And found her in bed with someone else"

"What fabric is Mario's overalls? Denim denim denim."

"A threesome with an older couple Girl: Babe come over Guy: Can't having a threesome with an older couple Girl: My parents are not home Guy: I know"

"How do you get a bass player off of your porch? You pay for your pizza."

"Charlie Sheen Says He Has HIV... Finally a positive in his life."

"As far as I know original golf joke So what does a bogey have in common with a dead golfer? One too many strokes."

"The waiting list for the WiiU.... Just got shorter in Conneticut"

"Q. What do clouds do when they become rich? A. They make it rain!"