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Joke of the Day

"What did the welshman do... ...when his girlfriend asked him how many sexual partners he'd had? Fell Asleep"

"Cops in movies keeping guard outside hospital rooms have a 0% success rate."

"What do you call a whirlpool in a church? Holy water!"

"How does a religious extremist convert an atheist into a holy man? They use a machine gun."

"GROCER: slide your card ME: it didn't work GROCER: does it have a chip? ME: *puts hand over pringle in my pocket I was saving for later* no"

"R.I.P. 2013 (2013-2013)"

"I give to you a joke I made up when I was seven: Why did the computer crash? Because it had a bad driver! drops mic"

"There were 99 people on a boat, and then it turned over. How many were left? 66."

"Why did the dung beetle go to rehab? He was rolling balls."

"I'm tired of being told to remove my card rapidly. Starting a new ATM for people who wanna remove their card at a more chill pace"