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Joke of the Day

"My social outings consist of the ""maybe attending"" events I never attend on Facebook."

"Girl you must be a freezer, because I want to put a dead clown in you."

"What's the difference between God and a medical school graduate? God doesn't think he's a doctor."

"What do ya call a grizzly who's interested in both sexes? Bipolar Bear"

"How do you throw a party in space? You planet."

"If Indiana Jones was a new-born Christian what would he change his job title to? Arkeologist."

"Took the shell off my racing snail to see if I could make it go faster... Just made it a bit sluggish."

"How come Apple-products have so small transistors? Children have very small hands"

"How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb? Fish."

"Oh. You lost your phone and it's on silent? If you like it, you should've put a ring on it."