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Joke of the Day

"They say real men hunt their food, which is why I throw a spear through the box of pasta before letting it bleed out in my shopping cart."

"I used to go to Weight Watchers to meet women [FIXED] Turns out they're way harder to pick up than I thought."

"Well, well, well. Guess who the grocery store asked to come back soon"

"[NSFW] I think I might be gay... ...Every time I touch my dick I get hard"

"Where do Koalas love to go for a holiday? Koala Lumpur."

"They told us to get in formation So, I started investigating."

"Substitute teaching 1st graders was not at all the Dead Poets Society experience I was hoping it would be."

"What do you call two homeless people hitting each other with garbage bags? A Pillow Fight"

"A dad joke which you can use.. Young Man: I've come to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage. Girl's Father: You've got to take all of her or it's no deal."

"Aspirin Before climbing into bed, a man sets down a glass of water and an aspirin on his wife's bedside table. ""What's this for? I don't have a headache"" she says. ""Good. Let's fuck."""