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Joke of the Day

"""As first lady you would be responsible for the White House china. Any thoughts?"" MELANIA TRUMP: Oh, Donald says he's getting rid of China"

"What do you call a wooden spoon in the bedroom A weapon of ass destruction"

"I got fired from my job.. ..for being a pervert I don't understand why, though, I'm always hard at work."

"I drank way too much yesterday and took the fattest girl home. I ended up hammered and waisted."

"Two crows are in jail. What are they in for? Attempted Murder"

"German Girlfriend My german girlfriend likes to rate my sexual performances on a scale of 1-10. Last night we tried anal. She kept yelling 9. That's the best I've ever done."

"To the woman who keeps pounding on my door at night, I'm not letting you out!"

"How to you read a book? Just reddit."

"What did Kris Kross tell the nervous paratrooper? ""Tell her you're a paratrooper. Chicks dig that kind of thing."""

"Why are there more females in the asexual community? because lesbians don't get boners."