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Joke of the Day

"Why can I never be a doctor? Because I don't have any patients"

"What's long, hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber."

"Self-deprecating humor is kind of my thing, or at least that's what I tell myself."

"Did you know that God is rich? Yeah, back in Israel he made a prophet."

"And as they were eating, Jesus took content and linked to it, giving it to his disciples, and said, 'Take, eat; this is my brand'"

"The President of the United States, the Prime Minister of England, and the King of Thailand walk into a bar in Bangkok and the bartender says ""May I get you and your guests drinks, Your Majesty?"""

"Whats the difference between your mom and a mosquito? (not for sensitive peeps) A mosquito stops sucking after you slap it"

"Three stages of life. * Birth * What the hell is going on?!? * Death"

"People will hate you, rate you, break you, and shake you. How strong you stand is what makes you.("",)"

"Why didn't the engineering student have a good relationship with his professor? There were too many truss problems."