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Joke of the Day

"So I was wondering whether any of my friends could possibly teach me quidditch... ...and then I thought, ""wait a minute, I know one. Oliver would""."

"How do you make stupid children? I don't know, ask your parents."

"How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask which period it came from."

"My neighbor was a vampire When I stabbed her in the heart with a wooden stake, she died."

"Losing my virginity was like being born again Naked, soaking wet, crying in the hands of my father..."

"6: can i have ice cream? Me: ur room clean? 6: if I clean it can I have ice cream? M: sure 6:*looks at room* thats ok I dont need ice cream"

"I think I love my girlfriend... But I need to ask Rudy Guliani to be sure."

"A shark walked into a bark..."

"I could Juggle right now, but I don't have the balls to do it."

"How do you make a German Shepherd? Put him in a synagogue."