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Joke of the Day

"Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards."

"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one is a watermelon."

"Scientist: we've finally taught a dog Morse Code Dog: [taps paw] Me: what did it say? Scientist: ""woof"""

"The past, present, and future walk into a bar... It was tense."

"Limerick I learnt at my all boys school There once was a man name of 'Dave' who kept a dead whore in a cave. She started to stink, and was no longer pink, but think of the money he saved!"

"How many vegans does it take to... None. Nobody needs fucking vegans for anything."

"Do you know what evil kisses sound like? Muah hahaha"

"After eating Thanksgiving at my house, my friends are always asking me how I prepare the turkey... ...easy, I tell the bird he is going to die."

"why did helen keller masturbate with one hand? so she could moan with the other..."

"The past, the present, and the future got into a fight It was tense"