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Joke of the Day

"Which came first? Chicken or the Egg? Neither. I CAME first!"

"I work in food service. .. We've cooked so many passover meals, it's like everyone is afraid of ovens."

"1. Cover elevator floor with glue. 2. Put ring on floor. 3. Wait for someone to kneel and get stuck. 4. ""Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!"""

"No, you're not fat, you're just easy to see."

"Sometimes waking up means the best part of your day is over."

"Did you hear about the transformer who lost his ability to change into a seven-sided shape? He's a de-septagon."

"Use the promo code NETFLIX To get 50% off your next exam!"

"The plus sign could not stop taking cocaine. I guess you could say he was add-icted"

"Dear Egyptians, please chill the fuck out while we consult our groundhog for advice."

"Why was the wife worried that her husband was a light drinker? Every night, he'd go out and drink until it was light."