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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a penalty shot in basketball, and a tiny curly wig designed for a bug? One is a free throw, and the other is a flea 'fro."

"How many hobos does it take to screw in a light bulb? They don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in dumpsters"

"You can burn up to 150 calories through one vigorous session of masturbation... Still got me kicked out of my weight watchers meeting though."

"I hate when job recruiters ask me where I see myself in 5 years. Like come on, dude, I don't have 2020 vision."

"Jesus walks into a hotel and hands the receptionist a couple of nails and asks... Can you put me up for the night?"

"Don't give Trump viagra He'll get taller."

"My math teacher accused me of cheating, I can't help that my English teacher is hotter."

"What is a Mexican's favorite bookstore? Borders"

"How did the snowman get happy? The snowblower came around"

"What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones"