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Joke of the Day

"A thug holds a gun to a dictionarys head and asks "" final words?"" the dictionary says ""zyzzyva."""

"My future is so bright I need to stay in my room browsing reddit until nightfall."

"My father's sister is obsessed with killing germs, we call her Auntie Bacterial."

"What's green and smells like pork? Kermits finger! This is a guy I knows fav all time joke and I told him I would put it on here after telling him the jokes I read on here."

"DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HUNTER & A STALKER What's the difference between a hunter and a stalker? ANSWER: The hunter has to wait until it's in season!"

"Pregnancy tests make me wish peeing on things answered more questions."

"A masochist asks a sadist ""Please hurt me."" ""No,"" replies the sadist."

"I think I lost an electron I'm feeling pretty positive though"

"I was wondering why it gets bright even before I see the sun rise in the morning. Then it dawned on me."

"Ironic! That even if Oscar pistorious is found not guilty .He still won't walk free"