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Joke of the Day

"There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in tendifferent puns, hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately,no pun in ten did."

"ALCOHOL. Because no one looks back on their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep."

"[rubs magic lamp] GENIE: You get 3 wishes ""Anything?"" GENIE: No wishin for more wishes ""I wish for more genies"" GENIE: I don't like you"

"What do Leonardo Dicaprio Babe Ruth have in common? They both won when neither of them were competing against black people!"

"Go to Target for shampoo. End up leaving with a blender, new pajamas, a couch, four kids and a car."

"Why is a vagina similar to the weather? Because when it's wet, it's time to go insiiiiide!"

"What do you call mustard that's not very hot? Air condijoned. I'll see myself out."

"Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will ""Let It Go."

"Why is suicide illegal? Because no one wants to clean up your mess."

"Makeup tip: You're not in the circus."