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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I've never paid to see a lentil."

"Why are Cal Tech and MIT constantly Fighting? Because MIT blames Cal Tech for stealing their Feynman, and there will never be another man as Fine."

"To the account who followed me while I slept and then unfollowed me before I woke. My apologies for taking a break. It won't happen again!"

"""Give it to me!"" she yelled. ""I'm so fucking wet!, give it to me now!"" She can scream all she wants... I'm not giving her my umbrella."

"This Facebook is my serious account. The funny one is my bank account."

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? It's easy to roast beef..."

"Not to sound like a broken record, but moooon rivrivrivrivriver."

"It's impossible to slowly tiptoe around without activating T-Rex arms."

"My favorite joke is about music... It's a well composed joke."

"What do politicians and diapers have in common? They both should be changed regularly, for the same reason! *ba dum tssh*"