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Joke of the Day

"Relationship advice: Find someone who likes (or dislikes) the same amount of air-conditioning as you, and stick with them."

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"4k tvs? no thanks i only need one"
"Both cats and dogs are illiterate, but I bet dogs feel bad about it, while cats don't give a shit."
"Past, the present and the future.. The past, the present and the future all walk into a bar at the same time.. IT WAS TENSE!"
"Why did the circus animals go on strike? The elephants found out that they were being paid peanuts compared to the rest of the troupe and the ringleader was taking the lions share."
"The Garlic Eater by I Malone"
"There was a soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray He's now a seasoned veteran."
"Worried about hair loss? Just draw little rabbits on your head. From a distance they'll look like hares."
"Pitbull: Hey, what rhymes with ""Kodak""? Nicki Minaj: ""Kodak"", duh... Pitbull: Thanks!"
"Why do white people own so many pets? Because they cant own blacks"